8/7/2008

Of Separation

(The can of beans is just to show scale. Please don’t read anything in to it. There’s absolutely no correlation between Hills beauty Audrina Patridge and a can of delicious La Sierra refried beans with chipotle. None.)

According to their website,

Six Degrees magazine is a powerful pocket-sized 192-page (free) publication dedicated to fashion and entertainment. We spare no cost in paper, printing or design quality so as to ensure the collectability of our magazine.

Six Degrees: You’re best known for being the gorgeous brunette on The Hills, yet in a picture of you as homecoming queen you have blonde hair. Were you bleaching your hair at the tender age of 15?

Audrina: No! That’s my real color. I’ve been dying my hair and eyebrows darker since I was 18.

Previously

you would think they could at least take the fedoras off at the pool.

she wanted to grow up to be Dr. Phil??

her boobs are jacked. much more striking as a brunette.

that’s a tiny magazine. lifesaver christmas stocking stuffer book small.

she came from the back of the pack and turned out to be the prettiest.

do want.

I test at a genius level IQ but I will gladly get a lobotomy so that I can deal with her pillow talk. I can see her lovers having to listen to 2 hours of what her friends did to annoy her. But really, if you can’t figure out what any of it means, how bad could that be?

She’s Tara Reid, v2.0.

Also, did anyone notice the douches in the pool with her? Does every dude in LA shave his chest?

Lame.

you will not see four douchier hats in a pool than what you see in those photos.

insert plugged-in toaster into that pool immediately

When I moved to LA from Atlanta last year I thought everyone was going to look like the dbags in that pool. Thankfully that hasn’t been the case…yet Oh, and that one guys lower back tat is boss…

Scripts