The Mute Button
Junket? Cherry? Boobs? Blow? Pigs? Donkeys? Horses? Hartnett? What the shitting fuck? This is the most cringetas-ticular guest appearance since… well, any show Patricia Heaton has ever appeared on. For example: Late Night With Conan O’Brien, Episode Number: 2146, Season: 13, Originally Aired: Friday November 18th, 2005…
Patricia Heaton: I had took a personality test a friend sent me on the Internet to tell you which world leader you’re the most like. You answer these questions and my friend is like, “I’m like Bill Clinton, take this test and see who you’re like.” So I answered all the questions: Saddam Hussein.
Conan: Really? Wow. You must be driven for power then.
Patricia Heaton: I answered the genocide question wrong.
Conan: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It’s hard to get that one wrong, you know. “Who knew human life is valuable?”
Ha! You kill us, Patty! But you know what’s really funny? The word “blow.” It’s hilarious! Seriously, try to use it in a sentence without cracking yourself up, you fucking pervert… See?!
Fingers on fi-ya! He’s the Malmsteen of his basement.
Are they reenacting the “sex for homework” scene?
Ugh, Patricia Heaton can go blow herself.
What a twat.
X 2.
Well, that makes sense - she is to comedy what Saddam was to human relations.
I’ll bet you anything the February 15th position will be “Right Tighty, Lefty Loosey.”
And I’ll bet you dollars to donuts that the February 16th position will be “Dollars to Donuts.”
reminds me of a nativity countdown calendar
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Starting to like that dirty little skank. You can tell Conan doesn’t know what to do with all that wild free spiritedness.
Cisco Adler has a sex position he calls “squished Gollum.”