Who wouldn’t go gay for female Danny Devito.

Man, she’s white. And the black bikini ain’t helping matters.

That’s Kirsten Dunst?

Why, I just had drinks with her at a speakeasy last week? 23-skidoo, if you know what I’m getting at!

Good lord, I think my eyeballs just melted.

Those white specs really show off her tan.

Our word of the day, class, is “cadaverous.”

Nothing worse than a skinny girl who’s not in shape. Can you imagine having sex with her? Must be liking humping a bleached chicken skin wrapped around a bag of obtuse rocks and mud.

Because nothing says sexy like flannel on the beach.

The bandeau top looks good on absolutely no one and should’ve stayed in the 80’s where it belongs.

Kiki looks like a scraped-out, unwashed oyster.
A delicious, scraped-out, unwashed oyster.
With white sunglasses.

I would not call her after I accidentally had sex with her.

She probably has a really hairy bush too, and smelly breath.

Nice flannel cover up on the beach. Why is she famous again?

why does perez hate on her so much is he secretly in love with her did paris hilton say she hated her and perez has to do whatever paris says too? wtf

Didn’t anyone notice the book? I know her white skin is almost as blinding as my NY winter tan….

Mom, Dad I’m Gay!

Soooo, is that her new girlfriend?

aha ha ahahaha

dear spencer sloan,

stop making shitty posts.

luv, mantits

I think she look alright. Not exactly hot, but certainly satisfactory.

You guys been readin’ too much Perez!

this is hilarious. (a) she looks awesome. (b) this photo makes me want to be her new best friend so bad it hurts. btw, spencer, you might want to go gawker on your comments cause we could do with some survival of the fittest up in these parts.

Why do I feel so let down every time I click on the ‘fid and there’s no update for the umpteenth time?

Please lay it on us spence!!!

I miss you Spencer, oh yes I do. No new fiddle goodness is like drinking a Guinness made of water. Every day. Eight times a day. Until there’s, you know, actually Guinness in the Guinness pint. A week later. And then I’m happy.

Oh, EddieEddieEddieEddieEddieeeeee