The following exchange between Michael Kors and Jessica Simpson takes place in the pages of the August issue of Harper’s Bazaar and is of particular note due in large part to the fact that the question posed by Kors is completely irrelevant, in relation to the answer given by Simpson. Allowing room for benefit of the doubt, perhaps she didn’t understand the question, or wasn’t paying attention, her caustrophobia was kicking in, she was zoned out, off in another solar system, or, as she appears in most of her photos in the magazine, devoid of brain activity. Anywho, it’s a yes or no question, and here’s what he gets…

Kors: After being with John (Mayer), do you think your taste in music has changed?

Simpson: I’m very happy in the situation I’m in, and I think that brings out the music in my soul. You know, when you’re in a situation that makes you happy and inspires you, it can’t get any better than that.

Firm in purpose, Kors picks himself up off the floor, regroups, and asks, again, this time from a slightly different angle.

Kors: Do you think you and John have influenced each others music?

Simpson: I love his Continuum record. There’s your answer.

“There’s your answer.” Indeed. Like throwing a ball to a smiling child and having it bounce off their head as they continue to stare back at you, drool slowly rolling out of the mouth, with zero recognition of what has just transpired.

More tear-jerkers after the jump!

Kors: What is your biggest indulgence?

Simpson: Bettering everyone around me.

Er, thanks? How… noble?

Simpson: Throw on a great trench coat, you know? It will turn heads, and it’s the most covering thing of all time.

Simpson: I’ve learned to embrace beauty as part of my career, as part of my soul, as part of who I am.

Simpson: People use music as an instrument, as a utensil to better themselves.

Simpson: And he (Willie Nelson) wrote “Crazy.” Then he fibbed and told me that is was originally called “Stupid.” [Sings] “Stupid, stupid for feeling so lonely!” So I asked, “Patsy didn’t want to sing that?” He said, “No, I was just kidding around with you, Jess.” And I was like, “Uh-oh, that one just went way over my head.” [Ed. note: Luke Wilson, you have no shame.]